still sad (after a year)

 

will i ever be happy?

why do i still cry? 

am i making the right decision?

…too sad to be rational at this hour.

post breakup thoughts

i thought i handle it well

i thought i am strong enough to fight my feelings

i thought i’ll be happy

i thought this is what’s best for me

i thought i will not regret my decision

i thought this is fkg easy

i thought it was the best solution 

well you thought wrong fy. you just lost the only good thing in your life. 

this is fkg hard 🥲

thoughts: 2337

mental breakdown

thoughts: 04:48

it just occured to me 

with all these problem...

that-

i'm just afraid

i am too afraid

thoughts: 0046

now i know why i stop.

thoughts: 0109

"memang nak lambat ke?"

"you kata before 30"

i rushed things because i am afraid i might lose it. 

one year later

hey!

i used to write here when i'm depressed, having uncertain feelings, and over thinking haha

but not when i'm happy



sad isn't it?


tbh, degree's life is full of depressing moments and shits but somehow i can't believe i do happy with all the experience why? maybe Allah gave me someone untuk terus kan my shity journey and i'm very thankful for that.






i used to looooove this space. my blog had been my diary and my comfort platform and then i just stopped. i really dunno why (or maybe i forget why)




anywho now i'm back.

thoughts : 0115

im at my lowest

i feel like shit

thoughts : 0031

until when?

until you can live without me

thoughts : 0258

aku berhenti setiap kali aku tahu aku tak boleh bernafas.

satu hari nanti, aku takkan berhenti lagi. 

bila?

bila semua sudah tidak peduli. 

they say...

they say "dont let your girl fall asleep with heavy heart"





cant relate.

thoughts : 2230

emotionally unstable

thoughts : 2236

again,

i mss the old me

the happy me.

okay takpe

takpe fy takpeeeee

takpe takpe takpe its okay takpe it is okay its fine takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe its okay takpe it is okay its fine takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe its okay takpe it is okay its fine takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpetakpe takpe takpe its okay takpe it is okay its fine takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpe takpeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

thoughts : 1915

ive made huge a mistake.

and i will never forget it.

thoughts : 0141

masih menangis sebab masih sakit.

#6

//crush - beautiful//

#5

food < favourite person ❤

thoughts : 02:21

ive make tons of mistakes

and still am




im no perfect






but if you cant accept that then im not the one





please. go.

thoughts : 00:08

kalau sebulan penuh kau nangis,

hari yang mendatang pasti kau dapat tepis.





tapi aku sekuat itu?





aku sendiri ragu.


ah.